It's that time of year again when the parenting community splits into two very distinct, highly vocal camps: "Yay, no school run!" versus "Oh dear sweet goodness, no school."
If you are currently three weeks into the summer break, you likely find yourself oscillating between these two states every 45 minutes. There are endless reasons behind these wildly conflicting feelings, and in almost every case, the absolute best answer to how you are coping is simply: it depends.
I trained with the renowned Lorette Michallon, founder of Slingababy, who is a passionate advocate for "it depends" being the truest answer to almost any question in life.
Take a quick moment and apply it to your day today. Should you have a cup of tea or a glass of water? Well, if it is chilly and you are craving comfort, tea is the obvious choice. But if you are about to swallow your morning vitamins, you probably do not want to be washing them down with a scalding mug of builders brew. Unless, of course, you enjoy burning your tonsils first thing in the morning. I am certainly not here to judge.
When we apply this exact concept to our daily routines getting turned upside down by the school holidays, everything starts to make a bit more sense.
On one hand, it is an absolute blessing not having to drag an emotionally unstable mini-human out of bed at 7:00 AM. You know the drill: convincing them to put on what is, let us be entirely honest, the most uncomfortable clothing choice known to mankind. The only thing worse is that itchy home-knitted jumper from Great Aunt with the fuzzy bits that tickle their neck.
On the other hand, it can feel like an athletic event trying to entertain that very same emotionally unstable, wall-climbing, question-dispensing human for weeks on end, especially when they are now hellbent on making their own decisions and dressing like the local charity shop threw up on them.
Here is the truth: it is completely okay to love having them at home while simultaneously resenting the fact that they are at home. That does not make you a bad parent; it makes you human. We are creatures of habit, and we really, really like our routines.
When the chaos hits a crescendo in my house, my absolute go-to strategy is putting myself in "time out". My designated spot is right on the kitchen floor. Sitting on the cold tiles might look slightly unhinged to an outsider, but showing your children that it is okay for grownups to pause and sit with big emotions is incredibly valuable. It gives them explicit permission to take their own time outs to re-regulate when the world gets too loud. Demonstrating how to regulate your emotions in real time will always be ten times more effective than just shouting at them to calm down. Time out does not have to be a punishment: grownups like a time out, too!
If you do not have school-age children yourself, enjoy the glorious lack of traffic on the roads right now! But please, take a second to check in on your friends who do have kids at home. Remind them that it is entirely normal to feel like they are barely keeping their head above water, and that every single day will depend on a million tiny factors.
All emotions are valid here.
More from Jodie: dealing with end-of-summer parenting guilt, and Why Less Is More This Summer.
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