Welcome back to our tour of the wonders of parenting, where we question absolutely everything.
In a world where we are bombarded with targeted advertising, AI-generated nonsense within social media, and endless unsolicited advice, we can easily forget to stop and ask ourselves: but WHY...?
At this point, I would like to introduce you all to my dad. He became a parent as a teenager and was immediately showered with a massive amount of input from everyone. This is his advice to me, and the one thing I want you to take away from anything that I share with you:
"Do not listen to anyone's advice; trust yourself implicitly. But that's my advice, so you should probably ignore that too."
When it comes to selling a product, one of the first things considered is who will be buying it.
Realistically, your newborn baby is not the one purchasing any of these so-called "must-haves". We're convinced by society that we need to be perceived as that "good parent". These products are designed for you as the customer. The idea of having products marketed directly at babies and children is relatively new. After all, why bother when they aren't the ones with the money? Let's face it: newborns are notoriously broke and have terrible credit scores.
There are so many historical products I could talk about to prove this point, but I chose the mid-20th-century "propped" mechanical feeders.
Tired of holding your own child? Introducing the Mechanical Feeder! It safely clamps a heavy glass bottle over your infant's face so you can walk away and go weld a submarine for the war effort! Who doesn't love being force-fed while also being left completely alone, after all?
Of course, looking back through a modern clinical lens, this design completely ignored a baby's basic biology. It led to many babies experiencing lower oxygen levels, an inability to take a break from the fluid, a spike in stress cortisol, potential food aversion issues, and a whole long list of: "OMG, please don't do that."
But hey, look at all that free time the parents had!
The truth is, the baby industry hasn't changed; the gadgets just got shinier.
Next time you're doom-scrolling at 3:00 AM and see a "revolutionary" baby product, take a second to analyze it.
Who are they aiming at? Is it the end user, or is it a sleep-deprived parent's wallet? It's a fun game. (Yes, I'm looking at you, £200 Wi-Fi-enabled, egg-shaped ambient organic whale-noise machine.)
More from Jodie: her look at nappies, marketing and landfill, and her thoughts on parental self-judgement.
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